Tuesday, December 06, 2005


"Kabhi sochta hoon... ki mein kuch kahoon... kabhi sochta hoon... ki mein chup rahoon..."
often the above lines reflect my state of mind i.e. to speak or not, to teach or not, to scold or not and even to post or not...
during college days after numerous endless heated debates(mostly on psychological and social issues) the conclusion was never to again enter into such discussions... the reason being nobody seems to listen or change ... but still i keep going on the same path... is it because i can't keep quiet when i feel that i know the truth?... initially this was the reason ... but seeing that people dont need the truth, the reason to speak up was gone... more importantly i felt that what is truth for me, what is right for me it is not the same for others owing to differences in their upbringing, their present environment, their strengths and weaknesses... may be my perception of world, of people doesnt applies to them ... my truth, my understanding can even harm them...
but somewhere in the middle i realised that to be quiet is not the way... i have learnt so much from hearing others, reading others, ... each of my interaction with people, knowing their view point coupled with my own personal experiences helped me in arriving at whatever understanding i have today... i feel that whatever i say and now a days write also (thanks to blogworld) it is going to be a part of database of some...may be a part of their thinking also... and more importantly to arrive at truth they shud know my viewpoint also becoz i am a part of the truth...

rest of this post is for vishnupriya (being tagged by him long back... he might have forgotten himself :-))
have to do the following:
A. from your 23rd post (or closest), post the fifth sentence online.
B. post a 55 word story

A. Closest post is current one.:-)
"but still i keep going on the same path."

B. 55 word story (do tell me if it makes sense)

"Again I forgot. She wept yesterday for hours". As he entered he saw little angel in dress she was asking since last week."Daddy, i love u..." she said while being in his arms. Amazingly he looked towards his wife. Her nod and smile made him feel like in heaven.

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

KIDS: They work wonders!

It was the end of the school year, and a kindergarten teacher was receiving gifts from her pupils.
The florist's son handed her a gift. She shook it, held it overhead,and said, "I bet I know what it is. Flowers." "That's right!" the boy said, "But, how did you know?" "Oh, just a wild guess," she said.
The next pupil was the sweet shop owner's daughter. The teacher held her gift overhead, shook it, and said, "I bet I can guess what it is. A box of sweets." "That's right, but how did you know?" asked the girl. "Oh, just a wild guess," said the teacher.
The next gift was from the son of the liquor storeowner. Theteacher held the package overhead, but it was leaking. She touched a drop off the leakage with her finger and put it to her tongue. "Is it wine?" she asked. "No," the boy replied, with some excitement. The teacher repeated the process, tasting a larger drop of the leakage. "Is it champagne?" she asked. "No," the boy replied, with more excitement. The teacher took one more big taste before declaring, "I give up, what is it?" With great glee, the boy replied, "It's a puppy!"

Sunday, November 13, 2005

Truth: Where does it leads to?

It leads to insanity... if u stick to it all the times.
It looks weird to me also thinking on these lines but this is what i have started to believe in since last couple of years.
I am not talking about the situation after understanding truth but about "speaking truth" all times as we understand it.
In childhood I could never understand why is it considered to be so great to speak truth all times. As years passed by I felt that may be it is due to weaknesses inherent in human nature that we need to lie at times. May be because we feel truth(as it appears to us) to be shameful for our existence. After few more years we realise that we can share truth with few because they r the ones who understand our perception, who care for it.
But still down few years comes the final realisation that "truth is not needed". Not all need ur truth, not all can listen to it, not all can undertand it, not all can live with it. It pains to know that people really dont need to know truth. The worst part is that at times even ur loved ones behave like that.
Now when i find people (though still in single digit count) who stick to speaking truth at all times I wonder whether they are abnormal. Watching kids, it appears as if majority human beings are hardwired to tell lies. Among the rest majority learns to tell lies observing others. Those who continue to be truthful all times are not they defying the nature? Apart from their own personal sufferings, troubles comes to their loved ones who then starts complaining.Even then if some people continue to be what they r (truthful), is it not a abnormality in them that they can't live without being truthful? They dont conform to majority behaviour, they make their and others survival difficult, they find peace only being what is not even required by any. They go against the nature's law that every living being works towards its survival and these selected few makes their survival difficult by being truthful all times.
Being truthful alienates u from the rest including ur most loved ones at times.

Monday, October 31, 2005

Happy Deepawali

Being unwell for nearly 2 weeks i was away from blog world for quite a long... still not recovered fully...will try to be regular now onwards...
leaving for home in few minutes for deepawali ...

Wishing all of you a Happy and Prosperous Deepawali!
May this deepawali brings good health and prosperity to u and all ur near and dear ones.

Thursday, September 29, 2005


Today is my friends birthday ... about whom i talked a few posts back ... even though initially i was going to write on something else yet when thinking abt wht to give to him as gift, one old question came to my mind ... it is abt gift ...

a gift u recived from somebody and for whom it was special ... problem is ... wht if that gift is liked by someone else among ur near and dear ones ...

to give that gift to somebody else looks like not caring abt feelings of one who gave it to u ...but not giving also amounts to same hurt ... hurting other person now ... but this is not the reason for my problem ... my dilemma is due to some other reason which makes me feel that giving the gift to the one who asked means caring for feelings of both the persons ... my mother told me this when i refused to part with one of my gifts ... i was in habit of keeping all gifts in store ... and now this habit is for feelings of special occasions which again i am unable to part with ... i didnt got any reason till now to part with my feelings ...

anyways this is off track ... the reasoning my mother gave is this ...

u hold that gift as very special ... and the person who asked for this gift is also among ur near and dear ones ... so again he is also special ... now giving the special gift u received to a special person means giving special attention to that gift and in turn to the person who gave the gift ... becoz u cant give anything as gift but only something special ... so u accorded special status to the special gift by giving it to a special person ... so u have cared for feelings of both the persons and had done the right thing ... but i also doubt if this reasoning is still correct in case the person who gave the gift doesnt agrees ... is the person who gave the gift has the sole discretion to decide abt the gift or can we go on with the reasoning waiting for him to understand the truth ... wht do u think ?

sorry if reading this caused a headache or looked like wastage of time ... it may sound silly i agree but wht to do ...

Tuesday, September 13, 2005


I think, therefore I am
I feel, therefore I am

which one u wud like to go with?

for me it is the latter.
First time when i read "I think, therefore I am" (it was when i went for interview to a comp) i was also impressed by it and it is true that difference in thinking does makes difference in ones life but why is that we think the way we think?
In all the discussion which were able to reach end point the reason for diferences in opinions came out to be the way we feel abt certain things.Even if two person r exposed to same set of data yet many times their conclusions differ due to differences in their feelings towards some basic issues of life. At the base of all our thoughts lies our feelings. Our thinking is shaped by our feelings.
More important than this is the fact that though level of thinking does determines our success and power level yet it is our feelings which defines us.
A line from the book,"Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince" : 'It is our choices, Harry, that show what we really are, far more than our abilities.'
Our abilities r determined by our level of thinking but our choices r decided by our feelings.

rest of this goes for barath. yeah, i have been tagged by him.
hey barath! atleast u check this out fully becoz for others it will be too boring a job to be finished.

Seven things you plan to do before you die!!

Walk on my two hands!!!
Traverse GANGA from gangotri to ganga sagar
Own a house big enough to accomodate all my bro and sis with their families
Contribute significantly towards building an orphanage and an old age home and couple them
Understand web of relationships
Become soumya ie get rid of all my anger and aggression
Defeat roger federer

Seven things you can do!!

Become quiet and serious
Confuse others
Argue endlessly
Drive unsafe
Be more jovial
Stop blogging!!
Increase saying thankyou

Seven things you can't do.

Say no to nice ppl(otherwise u wud have been saved from reading this)
Listen to selfish ppl even if they r among the most of intelligent
Stop telling truth as seen by me (even though it is not needed)
Stop teasing kids and my brothers and sisters and frnds
Stop trying to wake up early and exercise
Feel less responsible for all my identities
Be unanswering to anybody

Seven things that attract you to the opposite sex!!

Truthfulness in behaviour and expressions
Unenemity towards all
Care for society,poor and weak
Long hair and blackdeepexpressive eyes
Concern for parents
(Above all) Being a human

Seven things you say most!!!

abe yar!
kya bat hai!
kuch nahin
abhi kar raha hoon
maloom hai
its fine

Seven celebrity crushes !!!

Meena kumari actress
Srikanth cricketer
Sunnu deol actor
Akshay kumar actor
Pete sampras
Kim clijsters
Katrina kaif

...its my turn to tag others

hey, u r tagged if u have come upto this point :-)
so plzzz plzzz do the needful at ur end.

Saturday, August 13, 2005


"Swami Dayanand Saraswati while in a journey offered a fruit to a child who was travelling along with his mother. Even though only after approval from his mother child accepted the fruit yet his mother slapped him. Swamiji in shocked state asked the woman the reason for such behaviour. She replied to him that she had slapped him not becoz of accepting a thing from stranger but becoz of child not saying thankyou in return."

It was only few months ago that i heard this story from my frnds's brother but my belief in being thankful for slightest of gestures matched with the mother in story. My thoughts on the issue originated due to the shocking response i got on vacating a seat for an elderly woman travelling with her son of my age.

i believe that it is the usage of words like thankyou along with such true feelings that plays an important role in shaping the future of society. except few ppl all need recognition, reciprocation in one form or the other for the help they provide. timely gestures in return provide energy to keep them going on other occasions as well. this feeling then circulates. this tendency to help others keeps on penetrating the society which in long run makes it stand apart from rest...

on the other hand if we forget to be thankful to anybody it makes the other one to feel that his efforts were not needed, that they have spent their energy without use. it prevents him from doing same on other occasions as well. others observing such ungrateful behaviour of few also feels demotivated for helping others for they fear same consequences. this scenario in long run proves disastrous for any society... as time passes by the situation gets worse.it makes ppl feel divided and act selfishly. they forget wht others did for their peaceful existence since this wht they have been witnessing all their life...thanklessness...

at times when my thinking goes towards selfishness seeing the state of ppl around me( especially elder section of society) i feel amazed at the sacrifices made by our freedom fighters. i wonder wht made them go for it? i feel it was their beleif in their ppl as well as newer generations... that their sacrifices r needed as well as wud be reciprocated... but sometimes i am confused whether they judged the society correctly or society was different those times or society is same and it is me who is at fault in finding faults in others...
whtever be the truth i try to keep helping others and my strength is the the fact that at many times i had received help even without asking for it. no of times ppl helped me is still greater than the times i helped others. still no of men who vacated seat for my mother and aunts is greater than no of women for whom i vacated...
and even if it happens that i dont get help anymore i wud still be going same path since i owe too much to those who made it possible for me to be born in a free country...our freedom fighters... and more than for myself i am grateful to them for the life they made possible for my family, frnds, and all my countrymen...
i want to live upto their dreams...
and i fear many times what if it doesnt happens...

Thursday, August 04, 2005

busy week...
not becoz of h.264 but becoz of household work... MAA is satying with me now a days... so busy all the time in shopping... till few days back i just had clothes and books with me as my only pocessions but now... fridge, tv, almirah, cooler, furniture , cooking gas, kitchen ware etc etc ... what else remains... still new things coming up everyday... i am very lazy person but all the time active now a days becoz of her... life revolves so much around her...
always felt amazed when ppl say women hold less command than men in this world... to me all my life till now seems to be controlled by her and still the control is on :-(
felt relieved on seeing one pic in today's TOI... mukesh ambani holding hand of Kokila ben... hhahaha...such big men powerful by all means still under control of mother... i am not alone my type...
i think being obedient and being successsful has a strong conection... i feel this to be true for indians atleast...hmmm much still remains from my side in this regard...will write abt it in my next post... time to leave... for still more purchases...
best wishes
one more thing... always forgetting...
thanks a lot everybody for ur valuable comments... i know my posts r boring kind but this is wht i am... thanks for coming up here...

Friday, July 22, 2005



So much of our understanding is due to pain and sufferrings we undergo.
Our failures become our greatest teacher.

Are we right in saying that those who havent failed are unable to understand life completely?
Or just by imagination and intellect is it possible to come to absolute truth?

I have learnt a lot from my failures and pain and sufferings. They make me feel that i understand life a lot and human beings too. I doubt if my understanding wud have been same if my experiences didnt have that much failures.All ppl i have met having good understanding of life have also suffered failures

But sometimes i feel that my perception is biased in giving so much importance to painful experiences.I feel that for someone it is possible to have complete understanding w/o having suffered.Even those ppl whose havent met with failures of any kind can arrive at truth, can have total understanding of humans, nature, life etc etc...

But i am yet to meet such person.
And i am not sure if such person do exist.

What do u think?

Friday, July 15, 2005

Speaking at Oxford after receiving a honorary degree of Doctor of Civil Law, Dr Singh said,
"Today, with the balance and perspective offered by the passage of time and the benefit of hindsight, it is possible for an Indian prime minister to assert that India's experience with Britain had its beneficial consequences too"

PM of india has said this
how can any INDIAN say this?

If being highly eduacted, having higher understanding means praising those who exploitated ur ppl, i hate to be highly educated.
i dont have proper words to express my anger.

Prime Minister Manmohan Singh on Friday acknowledged the "beneficial consequences" of British colonial rule like "free press, constitutional government, professional service, modern universities and research laboratories.

how can such things be beneficial if they r smeared by blood of ur own ppl?
we dont need to learn such things from others.
we were the first in having such institutions.
even for the sake of diplomacy was it necessary to put it this way?

Saturday, July 09, 2005

"Those who say 'It is better to be alone than in a bad company' have never really been alone."
(Dialogue from a movie "FAMILY")
My understanding of loneliness as applicable to above statement is the absence of a person in our life whom we trust fully and share all of our emotions, thoughts with that person.
This dialogue conveys my feelings totally towards need of human beings for companionship.
I think as human beings this need of ours is genetically hardwired in us. We always have a urge to share our thoughts with someone. We need someone infront of whom we can empty ourselves.
I feel w/o such person in our lives our life is incomplete and with such person life is beautiful.
But i worry sometimes whether this need will die out or it is for whole of my life?
Seeing my elders i doubt if this need if for life?
or is it just becoz of our age in which we have so much new to share, to talk abt...?
I dont know if i am correct in saying that we all need such person in life be it our close friend, brother, sister, parents, husband/wife or lover?

Friday, June 17, 2005

Dont they feel pain?

Recent incident of killing of balckbucks by Mr Pataudi and delayed activity of police personnel (that also after media attention) has made me to talk abt this issue.
No, it is not whether Mr Pataudi will be finallly punished or he will escape like other big personalities.
I just want to know that why only killing of endangered species is crime and not others?Other animals/birds r not living or they dont feel pain ?
for sake of taste, daily unnumerable birds/animals r kiled
This seems to be the motto of non-vegetarians
can such people be called sensible, sensitive or caring for earth?
i am just unable to understand these things
can anybody help me in this regard?why people continue to be non-vegetarians even after realising that they are contributing towards increase in pain and sufferings in the world?

Thursday, June 09, 2005

And now the resignation of Mr. Advani after much uproar for his remarksin pakistan regarding babri masjid demolition and jinnah.
This man is one of few about whom i have to change my views drasticallybeing a huge fan of him before BJP came to power( when i was in12th)and now his worst critic.
He must be going through intense pain seeing opposition in bjp as wellas rss.
BJP has been reared by him upto this stage yet he has beencharged as traitor by the same organisation by his own followers and fellowmen
when your own people are unable to understand you then the situatuionis very painful
His being home minister i expected him to show some concrete resultstowards acheiving final solution for problem of kashmir
but nearly all including me were disappointed by his performanceand

Thursday, June 02, 2005

Thanks and one more

Thanks everybody for your response and special thanks for the welcome.

I wont argue further for INDIA being safest place for women.
I can only say that of all the families i have come across in my life everywhere it is women who were having there say specifically daughters.
yes there r troubles for women but those r present in every place of earth
May be u will understand me when u grow up have exposure and r able to understand life in its entirety
Indian men r most sensitive and emotional as compared to their cunterparts in other parts

The reason I posted the previous article was that i was totally annoyed by one debate posted on ndtv.com where they were projecting RAPE as a matter of gender divide.
I could not just think that way.
Man commiting the crime is not representing male section of society.
exploiation is unrelated to gender. It is related to relative stregths
I replied to that debate but my reply was screened out
Moreover i posted my own debate but even that was not published
i posted one sily thing but it was published

so i tried to gather response from people through this medium

i dont think if u r anytime coming here again and reading this
if u do so and have plans to visit again plz leave ur comments so that i may have motivation to write and for sure it will be on social issues mostly
u can tell me if there is better way to get public response on social issues

for @$#!$#
i agree rape is completely unacceptable as well as exploitation of weak by strong but it is the truth we see everyday in our lives that weak is always exploiated by strong
what u r saying is civilisation in true sense but that doesnt happens in reality due to weaknesses inherent in humans

Tuesday, May 24, 2005


I am really diturbed by the way the issue of rape is beng projected as matter of gender inequalityIt is not only women that have to face harrasment, exploitation but men also have to undergo such phases in life.Infact rape is manifestation of very fundamental truth that pervades every aspect of MOTHER NATURE that bigger fish eats smaller fish.
All those who r weak have chances of being exploited by strong.It is clear from our everyday experiences that govt efforts alone are insufficient to protect life.So our safety depends at last on our mental alertness. That how well we are able to judge situations and people around usc determines our safety.Also we have to be in habbit of sacrificing small pleasures for our own safety.Going out at 2 am is unsafe for men also and not only for women.So care has to be taken at individual and family level first and then comes the role of society and govt efforts which no doubts needs improvement not only for dealing with cases of women exploiattion but in entirety.
And at last such case should not be seen as crime by men against women.There are animals present in disguise of human beings which could be both men and women. In fact majority of men have always tried to make this world a better place for women. India is the safest place for women on this earth.